Things they said to do to “sell” better:
- Ask open ended questions
- Nod your head and say things like “ahum” to show you’re listening
- Mirror their body language
- Get them saying “yes”
- Always look them in the eye
But, there’s a problem.
If you’re too focused on your perceived performance, you miss the reason all of these things actually work in the first place.
Great listeners hear what the person across the table from them wants, needs, and feels.
They can teach the signposts and signals to look like a good listener. You can follow all of them to the T and even sort of look like you know what you’re doing.
But unless you’re actually listening to what they want, need, and feel, unless you’re using the head nods and mirrors to highlight their points and not your performance, you’re just wearing a conversationalist’s costume.
#1 on the list is always, always, always: listen.
Need a masterclass on listening? Celeste Headlee. Go study her.