Building Bridges: Why Gen X and Millennials Hold the Keys to Community

Of course it was a few days after recording an Excess Returns when I heard Amy Poehler say some version of this (and I started kicking myself because it would have been PERFECT to use when Dave Nadig and I were talking through clips from his Neil Howe interview on generational theory / Fourth Turnings).

Poehler says, "Boomers are ALL about money. Gen X wants to know if it's REALLY all about money? Millennials want to know WHERE is this money you're talking about? And Gen Z is pondering WHAT even is money?"

I know I'm paraphrasing her, but the essence of how differently 4 generations view 1 topic almost as important as water and air is profound. If you think the world is a scary/divided place right now, she's giving us a big clue of why. Talking with Dave, I can't help but feel like Gen X and Millennials are in a unique spot to help fix it.

An overarching lesson in Howe's work is how the perspectives across generations are different, but the entire experience-formed operating systems are unique.

Boomers built institutions around the certainty that money mattered most. I'm not even saying this in a negative way. They were claiming their own "greatest" status from their parents and grandparents, and finding a ruler to prove it without a world war or two. The result was 401(k)s, suburban sprawl, and maybe a little more self-credit than was warranted, but I'm not judging anybody (here at least).

Contrast that to Gen Z who's busy asking with genuine curiosity about if any of these assumptions even make sense. They're putting money, work, and success on the chopping block and asking, "Well, sure, but OK, what if we hack this up, what really could go wrong?"

Boomers and Gen Z are representing two extremes right now. And that puts Gen X and Millennials in a very interesting place. Plus, that's Dave and I, so we're biased, and you're reading me and... write your own post if this doesn't resonate with you, OK?

Gen X learned to wonder "but is it ALL about money" alongside watching Better Off Dead enough times to understand the differences between Lane, Monique, Roy, Ricky, and Beth, on top of all the intra-generational and cross-generational status dynamics. Gen X learned to quietly choose their own solo adventure in the shadow of the Boomers.

Millennials learned to wonder "WHERE is the money" because they were promised the same payoff their parents got, only to discover the ladder was missing a bunch of rungs in the form of somebody else's home equity, career extension plan, and "I figured it out, now you figure it out, but don't you dare disrespect me" attitudes.

When you start to mix your Nadig's and Zeigler's together, you start to see how Gen X has the emotional distance to critique the system, and Millennials have the urgent motivation to change it, with Howe telling us the operating system we need to reprogram, like, now.

As much as I spend my time wondering where the community is and focusing on how to create it in and around my own life, my Gen X friend Dave here kept bringing me back to earth with the reminder that nothing creates community like conflict.

That's not to say we need to pick a fight, but it is to say we need to pick an appropriate enemy. This is probably the biggest challenge of the (social media versus pro-social) world today. Manufacturing consent was one thing, at least that was about getting people to agree on something, even if the something was questionable. But manufacturing conflict in the form of engagement bait? That's a nameless and numberless world war of its own accord. We're fighting ghosts and algorithms instead of actual problems.

The result is bizarro communities rallying with and against ideas that nobody can quite pin down. I mean, yield max sub Reddits, crypto Discord servers, Facebook parent by political affiliation sub-groups, this is a weirdly fractured society that may not need a MASH grand finale, but sure could use a more productive mono-cultural mashup.

The problem isn't that communities don't exist - it's that community only seems to exist in fragments and factions that don't have any need to talk to each other.

To which I'll add, please keep yield max out of my fantasy soccer group chat, but also, I know the people in my chat know how to cross lines in their own lives and this is a skill we don't talk about enough.

Where do we go and what does Gen X and the Millennials have to offer?

If you're a Nadig, know you bring practical wisdom to the table. Not just in making zines or being able to combine boy scout skills with breathing techniques. You know how to differentiate between what works and what sounds good. Do us all a favor and cut through the BS, with at least a little respect for your elders and youngers. Use that swiss army knife's edge for good.

If you're a Zeigler, know you bring systemic thinking to the table. Not because we all got trophies, because we also recognized the trophies were a BS exercise when we threw away 16 of them in a box our parents handed us when we turned 30 without remorse. We know what tokens are real and which ones are fake (oh, those trophies, snuck them in before we got career laddered and then blamed the trophies for us being soft? Don't even get me started, I will Oregon Trail tombstone you so fast). We know how broken systems affect real people and can translate abstract policy into lived, meaningful experiences.

Mix the Nadig's and the Zeigler's together and we understand digital and analog. We aren't analog native or digital native like the extremes. This might be the bridge that matters most.

So what do we do?

We create multi-generational spaces. Dave is doing it by sourcing quotes for zines. I'm doing it on Just Press Record (see Keith Morris getting introduced to Ned Russin, with their 35 year age gap, as proof).

We focus on shared problems rather than shared demographics. We talk housing and healthcare and education and climate and we do it without focusing on generation divides, but rather we re-focus it locally on generation strengths to help our communities out. Focus (extra Mallrats).

We focus on building institutions that blend old stability with new flexibility. We mix analog and digital together, in the way only we can. And not just in convincing our credit unions to adopt crypto, but by linking local to national ideas with the magic of the internet, and making sure social media stays pro-social with how we bring it home with us.

Amy Poehler's joke is about how the framework we're mostly operating within fails. It's a joke about how we can't talk to each other because we all have different fundamental beliefs AND questions about what anybody outside of our generation is even thinking. The belief part is the problem here. We need ideas and questions, we need doubts and respect.

The communities that will thrive aren't the ones that sort by generation, ideology, or income. They're the ones that will harness their generational diversity as a strategic advantage.

Like Howe's work and how Dave reminded me: that's not predictive, it's prescriptive. That's good theory. And in a world where conflict increasingly fails to create community, it might just be our best hope.

More Neil Howe thoughts from me here.

More Dave Nadig stuff here.