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Grow Your Network: Mishka Shubaly Is A Resilient Writer
Here's HOW and WHY to connect with Mishka
Matt Zeigler
April 25, 2025
For years, I've been connecting with interesting people and documenting insights that might help my clients and myself. What was once private is now (mostly) public.
People often ask: "How do you know all these people?" and "How do you connect these (re: random) ideas?" The answer is simple: consistent relationship cultivation and thoughtful note taking. My north star is trusting my instincts, my maps are the constellations in these reflections.
Find my Personal Archive on CultishCreative.com, watch me build a better Personal Network on the Cultish Creative YouTube channel, and follow me on social media (LinkedIn and X).
This approach has helped tons of clients strengthen their networks and unlock new opportunities. You can:
Steal these ideas directly
Hire me to implement them with you
Create your own combination that works for you
I can't promise you'll learn from me, but you'll definitely learn something with me. Let's go. Count it off: 1-2-3-4…
Do you know Mishka Shubaly? Author, musician, memoir writer who turned sobriety into creativity? The man who worked behind the scenes with Mark Lanegan on his memoir "Sing Backwards and Weep" and published his own bestselling Kindle singles with a foreword from Jeff Bezos?
If not, allow me to introduce you. Mishka has transformed personal struggles into powerful creative work while helping others tell their stories. I wanted to connect with him because he embodies something I value deeply: the ability to channel life's darkest moments into meaningful connection and artistic expression. Oh, and he can do it without self-destructing. Mostly, or at least, he can do that now (but not so easily before, which, I just get it).
Our conversation is LIVE now on the Cultish Creative YouTube channel (and this Cultish Creative Playlist). Listen and you'll hear how he navigated the path from addiction to becoming a bestselling author and helping others share their stories.
In the meantime, I wanted to pull THREE KEY LESSONS from my time with Mishka to share with you (and drop into my Personal Archive).
Read on and you'll find a quote with a lesson and a reflection you can Take to work with you, Bring home with you, and Leave behind with your legacy.
WORK: Transform Your Struggles Into Creative Fuel
"I wanted to be a musician since I was a little kid, and my mom was like, you should be a writer. That's a much more reliable line of work... I sort of set out down those twin paths and then really followed music hard for a long time... got strung out on painkillers, though I was mostly a drunk and then finally got sober in 2009. Started publishing my writing, like a series of mini memoirs through Amazon, and had a string of hits with them."
Key Concept: Your most difficult experiences can become your most valuable creative assets. By embracing and transforming personal struggles rather than hiding from them, you can create work that resonates deeply with others while finding meaning for yourself.
Personal Archive Note-To-Self: I don’t like talking about myself, I don’t like talking about my past, and I don’t think it’s very interesting. BUT. You’re a human, you probably get this, and you probably feel the same way. It’s not interesting to us because we were there. To anybody else, on any remotely similar path, it might be some words they need to hear.
I wanted to be a musician, who ended up struggling in finance, until I started letting all my creative tendencies back into the way I operated. Couple that with re-surrounding myself with people I actually liked, and finding my own versions of getting healthy (or healthier, thank god I dodged the painkillers, but you bet your a** I know a thing or two about killing pain in my own ways).
You don’t have to bring your whole self to work, but if you don’t apply all the lessons of your life towards your happiness, you’re missing a massive opportunity.
Work question for you: What painful experience in your life could you transform into something valuable for others if you were willing to be vulnerable about it?
LIFE: Find Sobriety in Authentic Connection
"One of my sort of sober goals is to try to go through life as if I had two drinks in me without taking two drinks. 'Cause I know I can't stop, I couldn't stop there... Beer helps you tell your uncle that you love him. We have such problems with male intimacy. There have definitely been times where drugs or alcohol made me tell someone who I loved, that I loved them and I wouldn't have otherwise."
Key Concept: True connection requires vulnerability and authenticity that many of us have only accessed through artificial means. The challenge is finding ways to create that openness without relying on substances that ultimately harm us.
Personal Archive Note-To-Self: One of my wife and my favorite expressions is “You know what love is.” It’s referential to a Slum Village song, and, it just means more to me. To us. Because, yeah, you know what love is, because you also know what love isn’t. So if you know, and we all do, why not say it? Why not share it? Why not spread it?
The time you spend in life requires people. Investing in those relationships, in reasons for the good people to stay around and keep coming around, requires us to loosen up. We have to let our lives happen, and allow enough space for their lives to happen too. In the end, it’s as much about intention as it is attention. You do know what love is, you might just have to be quiet and wait until you feel it.
When I learned to loosen my grip on the hard control I was trying to exert on life, at work, in the reality of my lack of friends, just 10 years ago (or even 5, ugh), it was like Mishka’s “act like you’ve got two drinks in you without taking two drinks.” Don’t be sloppy, but relax, have a little fun, and make sure the others know they’re worth being around too.
Life Question For You: Where in your relationships are you holding back authentic connection out of fear or habit, and what would it look like to have "two drinks courage" while remaining fully present?
LEGACY: Make Happiness Your Practice
"For probably the last year or year and a half, I've been trying to make my project to enjoy where I am. I got married almost a year ago... I had it on my job list of like, 'be happier' and that's so self-defeating. And so what I did instead was my job list became, make a list of the things that make you happy and then just do those things. And I've had better success with that."
Key Concept: Happiness isn't an achievement to be reached but a practice to cultivate. By identifying what genuinely brings you joy and intentionally incorporating those elements into your life, you create a foundation for contentment that doesn't depend on external validation.
Personal Archive Note-To-Self: On a good day I exercise, I write, and I talk to people who energize me to get up an do it again tomorrow. There are chores and adult obligations and dog walks and STUFF along the way, but the good days contain those elements.
If I have more days with some movement, some creative time, and some quality connections, I create more days for others where I’m showing up as a decent version of myself, and maybe I can demonstrate back to them that this is an option too. Not definitely, but - who wants to be around people who haven’t figured this out and are stuck trying to force it? Kill the anxiety, as much as you can, with your own kindness. Easier to say than do, I know, but try.
Legacy question for you: If you made a list of things that genuinely make you happy right now, how many of them are you actively prioritizing in your daily life?
BEFORE YOU GO: Be sure to…
Connect with Mishka Shubaly on LinkedIn or via his other socials
Listen to his music on your preferred streaming platform or YouTube
And, take a moment to reflect on all these ideas!
You have a Personal Network and a Personal Archive just waiting for you to build them up stronger. Look at your work, look at your life, and look at your legacy - and then, start small in each category. Today it's one person and one reflection. Tomorrow? Who knows what connections you'll create.
Last thing: Don't forget to click reply/click here and tell me who you're adding to your network and why! Plus, if you already have your own Personal Archive too, let me know, I'm creating a database.