Narcissus, Brat, And A Reminder That It’s The Art That Will Save Us

[writer’s note: I don’t know where you land on the 365-Greek mythology vs. 365-party girl culture scale, but if you’re here reading this, you’re close enough to talk to about it with me. Let’s get weird. It’s important, because “All that matters is we help after the storms.” Ps. bonus shoutout to friends like Dave Nadig who want to talk about the overlap of mythology and pop culture randomly with me, and Ben Hunt and Jack Forehand who watched me torture this connection out of my brain as a Cultish Corner on Breaking News earlier this week - full episode below!]

It’s a conversation topic that keeps coming up lately. A conversation with self topic. A conversation between friends that we all feel like we’re having with ourselves:

Am I a good person?

I think I am, but do I believe it? Do I really believe it? Because lately I’m wondering,

Am I good enough for them - to like, to love, to…?

I see it in The Bear. I see it in Inside Out 2. I see it in Brat, as in the Charli XCX album, and in politics, and in political marketing criticisms (shoutout to Scott Galloway and Rusty Guinn especially for the latter points lately).

And it all makes me go back to one of the Old Stories: Narcissus.

(Ok, really, Echo and Narcissus, but forgive the mid-text footnote here, I just have to say we should all read and reread more Ovid)

Narcissus usually gets a bad wrap. The branding of narcissism - and its pop-culture weaponization in the past several years - usually references the psychological diagnosis of narcissism, to which I say, “I am no expert,” but still,

A narcissist is a person (re: anyone) who is selfish, entitled, lacks empathy, and needs admiration.

Look on social media, you’ll see the label. I’ve been called a narcissist too. I once told a therapist somebody called me a narcissist and they responded back, “No.” So, I think I’m clean. But the word and the use and the story are not always the same and this is where we start.

Nuance. Go figure.

Narcissus’ story is one of a particular prophecy and a particular curse.

The Narcissus prophecy is that he will not only be indefatigably beautiful, BUT can only LIVE if he learns to LOVE himself.

The Narcissus curse is that whoever he ultimately falls in love with will never be able to love him back.

So when young Narcissus pauses for a drink in the woods and spots his own reflection, he misunderstands the beautiful character in the water as another being.

And he falls in love.

And he dies, unable to break gaze with the gorgeous other.

The prophecy is fulfilled because he couldn’t recognize himself, let alone love himself.

The curse is fulfilled because the projection couldn’t love him back (and oh, the irony that it’s his own reflection - Ovid was not messing around).

If you’re not already asking yourself the questions, here they are again, because we need to:

Am I a good person?

I think I am, but do I believe it? Do I really believe it? Because lately I’m wondering,

Am I good enough for them - to like, to love, to…?

Charli XCX’s album, Brat, was a big enough deal for us modern-music nerds. I won’t middle-aged-mansplain it to you. I’ll just say the music is and has been crazy smart, with a punk attitude and energy that’s always hooked me, and she took the imagery to a whole other level.

Before it was meme-ified, spread across the internets, and landed on VP Kamala Harris’ Presidential Campaign Headquarters backdrop, Charli XCX’s Brat was an incredible artistic statement that landed with both aplomb and a cherry bomb.

Charli’s been a self-described “365 party girl.” She’s had an identity as that person, just enough celebrity as that person, and also, not quite enough celebrity as that person to make her the epitome of “Oh, it’s THAT person!”

There’s a depth to the album, now that it’s way in the light of the mainstream, you might have missed. It’s got lyrics. It’s got stories. REAL stories. Tortured text message style poetry (not a tortured poets knock, but also not not a tortured poets knock). HUMAN STORIES.

Brat is an album of what it would have felt like if Narcissus broke up with his reflection, swallowed the bitter pill of standing up from beside the water, and went into the woods to party it off with friends and a new-woodland nymph sweetheart.

It doesn’t come without a heavy emotional toll. It’s hard to rumble with the truth. And yet, Charli XCX just made an album of uncomfortable, text-message lyrics and meme-ready myth-level truths.

Being brat is narcissistic, staying brat is a choice.

The call to evolve is the call we all face. It’s a struggle. There’s a lot in that nuance too.

The pause, staring into the water, at what you understand to be a projection, and wondering how to answer the fundamental questions of 1. Am I a good person, and 2. Do they like me(?) is what Ben Hunt (and Liu Cixin) call “the great ravine.”

Nothing is happening. Nothing is changing. The prophecy is written and the curse stands.

Nothing happens until -

You make some art out of it.

The perfection is just a projection. A curse.

Set out on making more than nothing, but settle on perfect as just being a myth.

Fulfill THAT side of the prophecy. Love the creating, at least as much as the creation you step back and look at.

And never forget, there’s magic in the mid.

Nothing happens until Charli wrestles with her pettiness, makes a collaboration with her quasi-friend, gets engaged, does a ton of meta-media, and still finds the time to rock a Boiler Room set. And not even in that order. But still.

Nothing happens until, well, watch The Bear, watch Inside Out 2, watch all the artistic renderings that say we get out of this positively one way and one way alone.

OK, two ways - to start.

The broader prophecy stands. We only live if we figure out how to love ourselves. And loving ourselves is the first step to making, protecting, and teaching one other person, then another, and maybe another in our lives, for a difference that actually counts.

We can’t make the projection love us. The projection is the myth. The curse is failing to realize it’s just a story.

The small scale connections, the modes of communication, the people we surround ourselves with, the tech, and platforms we choose to communicate over - these are reflection and projection generators.

We have to choose them wisely.

Otherwise, the curse of the great ravine stands. We fall all the way in until either we fall back out, or until it doesn’t matter anymore because we’ve died waiting for it to change.

TALK ABOUT A DOWNER. There’s hope.

Stand the f*** up. Somewhere. The projection, the pond - the whole point here is:

Art is being made to show us a way out.

You’ll have to make some “art” to find your way out too.

And if you don’t know where to start, simply start by noticing it’s already happening.

Where do YOU see it?

The dandelion through concrete? The secret hidden book, with the promise of a bigger world? The hope inside of the desire to help?

Girl, it’s so confusing some times to be a girl

or broaden it out if you need to, she is speaking truths here after all,

Life, it’s so confusing some times to be alive.

This is the ravine. The reflection ain’t us. The only way out is through.

Accept the prophecy, reject the curse.

You can be a good person. The evidence will be in your actions. The people who like you will be the ones who stick around.

It still works.

Commit to your causes, commit to your community, keep it compounding.

Please. Make more art, make more community, make more choices that support arts and communities. We won’t regret it.

(Yes, I chose the remix with Lorde on purpose. Quick background - the original song seemed like it was about Lorde, which all sorts of people speculated wildly/obsessively about, and then as an official acknowledgment/reward that everybody knew it, Charli and Lorde did a surprise remix together, thus squashing the awkwardness of it all and making another text-message lyrical smash hit out of it. Amazing. ART people, it’s so cool.)

More readings on all this stuff, with plenty of extra discussion over at Epsilon Theory and on Echo Beach too:

Being Human At An AI Conference: Epsilon Connect 2024 Notes, my note trying to make sense of why making art and taking care of others are the most important things we can do.

We Are Losing Our Minds and The Weird Thing by Rusty Guinn. Rusty’s book… oh, I can’t wait.

This Is The Great Ravine by Ben Hunt. Which didn’t start this all, but describes it profoundly.

Peace: There are Alternatives to Spectating Suffering by Dave Nadig, which is grippingly gorgeous writing.

And, of course, if you want to hear/see me verbally try to put this all together on the spot, check out the Cultish Corner segment of: BREAKING NEWS: The Biden Harris Swap

ps. extra h/t’s are earned here, heavily to music critic Meaghan Garvey who first made the Narcissus connection for me with Lindsay Zoladz and Shaad D’Souza on NYT Popcast. All of their respective critical work is great too. Can’t not mention Anthony Fantano’s work on the record too. Surface barely scratched here, more names may be added as I think of them. Also tell me if you saw a great piece of criticism making sense of this record too!